A Scorpionic relationship can leave us feeling the tough withdrawal symptoms when this lover pulls away all of their powerful emotions and acts as if we don’t exist. From personal experience, after dating a man with Sun in Scorpio conjunct Pluto and falling under the Scorpion’s intense gaze, magnetic pull and compelling personality this was a subject in desperate need of tackling.
The famous stare is ever present, you know the one that astrologer Liz Greene describes as the man with x-ray vision. The Scorpio person doesn’t just look at you, they see right through you. After falling hard and then painfully feeling the sting of emotional withdrawal, it can all feel rather disturbing, especially how cold it all feels. A person turns invisible to those penetrating eyes as if one never really existed at all.
A Scorpio who feels scorned is not easy to deal with, and trying to get information out of them is like working for a super intelligence agency. It’s all about the subtleties, silent cues, and looking deeper and deeper. The exchanges that follow after wounding a Scorpio can be incredibly uneasy as the emotions appear to switch, but this is something which has been written about extensively in psychology. Freud termed this state ambivalent emotion; he was the first to propose the idea that we may both love and hate someone at the same time and one does not neutralize the other.
Scorpios may withdraw for a variety of reasons in a relationship, but their feelings run deep, so it is never an easy decision. They can be forceful personalities with much seriousness and depth, but they are also secretive. A Scorpio gives their love selectively and needs to develop a deeply meaningful relationship with people before allowing them to get close. They have enduring affections and loyalty and become passionately and permanently attached when they fall in love. Scorpio's do not love lightly and hate any kind of superficial bond. It becomes incredibly difficult to fathom Scorpio out because their feelings are deep and silent, and this makes them difficult to know unless you can reach the level of intimacy they seek and gain their trust. Plutonian people have the best camouflage of all the signs, which covers up the fact that they have the most sensitive and profound feelings underneath.
Scorpio has a problem letting go of control, and they have too much pride to let it show how much they are really suffering. Some Scorpios have been forced to see the other side of life at a young age, and have developed deep mistrust, especially if they have suffered an early trauma such as abandonment, abuse, betrayal, or death, leaving emotional scars. It can be very difficult for Scorpio to fully trust life, and their psychic sensitivity senses when there is the possibility of being wounded. Scorpio withdraws into that safe place within, and it takes a long time for them to trust and to forgive.
Some Scorpios, instead of seeking the ruthless revenge of their stinger scorpion’s – or rising above such bitterness like the eagles -they bitterly withdraw in tangled hatreds at each minor injury, hoping fate will punish their enemies, almost unconsciously willing destruction without direct action Linda Goodman's Sun Signs .
Most water signs find it difficult to verbalize their emotions, but Scorpio’s feelings are intensely felt, and there is an all or nothing approach to everything in life. Water signs tend to withdraw as a protective measure when they sense danger or the likelihood of being deeply hurt. Nobody can hurt Scorpio when they are shielding themselves, and because of their ability to feel more deeply than any other sign, they also cut deeply.
No other element holds a candle to water’s mystery, subtlety and long kept secrets. However, water people are not constant in the expression of their moods. Both Scorpio and Pisces are best known for the secretive qualities, but even Cancer is deeply private.
Scorpio is also famously known for skulking away and brooding over past hurts. The funny thing about Scorpio’s withdrawal – is that they hate any form of coldness. The nonreactive Scorpio, the one who has withdrawn, is actually in disguise and is covering up the fact that they feel rejected. They disguise their intensity and great sensitivity in order to protect themselves from hurt and humiliation. They need a great deal of emotional closeness, but Scorpio may also withdraw when they feel someone is being false or insincere.
your icy voice put out the stars
it cracked my heart, and broke it in splinters
your tone as cold as Colorado winters
but I promise to soon forget
the contract we almost made...you'll feel
the swift response of an equal
as the dream begins to fade
I'll drown you in pseudo kindness
and a casual, friendly glance
I can almost imagine your blindness
as I watch and wait
for the chance
to suddenly - cruelly - make you know
how easy it was to let you go
By Linda Goodman - From Venus Trines at Midnight